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Comparing Yourself to Others – the Right Way

We frequently and overly compare ourselves to others. While comparing yourself to others who you think are better than you at something is a terrific way to develop yourself, it also causes a lot of negativity and is bad for your mental health if done compulsively. It may also induce an inferiority complex, and as a result, you may lose confidence. While there is no one method to compare oneself to others, it can surely be done more constructively to generate possibilities.

When you compare yourself to others with a positive perspective, you seek your own improvement; yet, when you solely focus on what others have or accomplish better than you, you become gloomy. As a result, Mollie West Duffy, a specialist in organizational design, development, and leadership coaching, offers her advice on comparing yourself to others in this podcast episode on the Coaching for Leaders channel.

Comparing yourself to others

According to Mollie, individuals experience some emotions that they find difficult to express and that, in their opinion, are only felt by them. In reality, though, these are the feelings that a majority of people experience and struggle to deal with. ‘Stop comparing yourself to others,’ is one of the phrases that someone experiencing difficulties regularly hears as a result of comparing themselves to others.

However, it is seldom useful. Listening to someone impart positive thoughts for you may work in the short term, but it will ultimately fail since the problem has not been addressed from the core. As a result, Mollie offers some of her thoughts on the notion of comparison and how comparing yourself to others might be done more productively. According to Mollie, comparing is not an emotion. The emotions are the feelings that come along with comparison which can be envy, jealousy, or sadness.

One option would be to quit comparing yourself to others. Mollie responds that the negativity stems not from comparing oneself to others, but from ‘not’ comparing yourself enough. Individuals generally target people above them when comparing themselves to others, according to her. She, on the other hand, advocates comparing fully and so believes that while drawing comparisons, one must also consider people below their position in mind. Another suggestion made in the podcast is to use social media productively.

Instead of focusing all of your attention on already highly successful people and speculating about being like them, you may utilize social media to interact with others who are just getting started with something that interests you. In this manner, you may discover a chance to learn as well as build a solid network for yourself.

Finally, she suggests focusing on changing our mindset so that instead of being discouraged by other people’s accomplishments, we see them as proof that if they can do it, so can you!

Comparing yourself to others may be discouraging, especially if done compulsively, instilling anger and jealousy in you. The preceding material suggests a new approach to comparing yourself to others that you should attempt and must go through.

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